Truly Virtual Web Art Museum
by Rodney E.J. Chang
2014 Creative Frontiers International, Inc.
front door is open. Master is too busy arguing with my caretaker, his mate.
I’m short, even for a dachshund. I’m bad. I’m smarter than he thinks. And
there is that little old woman walking the big boy dog. Before any of the humans
wise up, it’s time for some fun!
little brown hot dog on four legs dashes out the door, scampers down the front
steps, and sprints down the drive way. That only takes five seconds flat,
regardless of its short, skinny, chicken-drumstick-like legs.
her owner can do is shout at the dog, “Hershey! Get back here!”
loser, you’re too late. I’m programmed and in motion like a guided missile.
Big baby dog-on-a-leash, I’m on you!
No! Here girl!” His wife, the dog’s caretaker, yells in vain.
can see the surprise in the young kid’s eyes. His master is frail and firming
up on the leash. Her eyes tell me she’s also got caught off guard. Here
ten-year old (70 in dog years) dachshund sprints into the street and crosses
over. She dashes towards the other dog, snarling and growling as fiercely as her
little vocal cords can generate. She bears her gnashing teeth with the glare of
hatred at the puppy, a huge husky.
you, didn’t I? Beware of my growl, my sharp teeth! You’re tied to a rope,
the big, muscular dog bolts forward. Growling back in dog talk,
you want a piece of me, do yah?!
The tremendous power surge
strips the leash out of its feeble owner’s hand. It’s
so strong that it jerked her forward, causing the old lady to lose her balance
and fall on the sidewalk. The rough concrete slams into her knee and bleeding
starts. Not important to either dog, however. In fact, both animals aren’t
even aware that the woman had fallen and was hurt. They’re locked in their own
world, confronting each other.
intimidating eyes of the dachshund turn into terrified eyeballs.
oh, leash loose. Other
doggie free! I’m history if he gets me!
puny weiner slams the brakes, skidding awkwardly to a halt, regains its stance
before the husky can sink its jaws into it, and then tears back towards its
house for safety – yelping.
dogs take off across the street, the male husky in chase of the dachshund. The
the hell do you think you are, coming on to me like that? I’m going to get
you, you old bitch!
doesn’t look good to the little dog’s master and his wife, the dog
caretaker. By the time the dogs race to the other side of the narrow street,
it’s obvious that the little short legs aren’t going to outrun the longer,
muscular, young ones. The towering husky is almost on top of the short
the view is obstructed for the dachshund’s owners. The canines are behind the
car parked on the driveway’s incline, obstructing a view of the dachshund and
the other dog from the viewpoint of her owners.
master is still immobilized by the shock and disbelief of the unfolding event.
He can only think of one thing.
time it’s game over for that trouble-making mutt!
frightened couple hear a shrilling sharp cry from their pet. It sounded like
their dear pet just suffered a bite.
worry, he only wants to play!” calls out the fallen old woman to the two at
the door with their mouths ajar.
that woman senile or what? thinks the husband, with astonishment.
all, everyone can hear the tiny dog squealing in anguish, as if attempting to
fend off an attacker determined to take its life. It is a scene of uncontrolled
mayhem. It sure didn’t sound like “he only wants to play.”
out of my way! You’re hopeless!” shouts the wife, as she pushes the
immobilized husband aside from the door, then storms down to where the barking
and Hershey’s hideous whines are coming from. She is indeed the dog’s
caretaker. Walks it, picks up the poop, feeds it, bathes it, pets it, brushes
its teeth, gives it a manicure, and puts it to bed on a regular basis. And now
also rescues it.
courageous wife manages to grab the little one away from the attacking bully. She
never considers how the aggressive animal could turn upon her
as she attempted to snatch away its prey.
caretaker glares down at the huge husky, making like it was about to jump up at
her to get to the dachshund, and screams with an authoritative voice,
Get out of here! NOW!”
big dog understands when a human is angry and realizes that it’s on that
human’s territory. The husky stares intensely at the woman’s fearless and
unwavering stern eyes, and then gradually backs off. Having lost the
psychological face off, the massive puppy trots back across the street to its
master, who is still calling it to come back to her.
boy! Come here, Bobby!”
the old woman is once again on her feet and quickly grabs the leash when her pet
had returned and was within range.
sorry our dog ran out into the street. The door was open…”
dachshund was the aggressor and had caused the woman to fall. There is a leash
law in the state of Hawaii and if this went to court (What if the woman had
broken her hip and a huge medical bill was the consequence?), Hershey’s owners
other hand, what if the little dachshund had been killed on its owner’s
sorry I let go of the leash,” apologized the wounded stroller. “My Bobby has
grown so strong.”
are you O.K., Mrs. Tamura?”
fine… just a bit bruised. I’ll be O.K.”
looked good that the two female neighbors had made up by apologizing to each
other. Without it being said, both parties agreed it was nobody’s fault. Shit happens, so goes the saying.
so glad to be back in the house and safe, thinks the dachshund. But oh, now the
pain is really bad! And I can’t walk on this leg that is bitten!
old daughter Rochelle, emerging from her bedroom and into the living room, spots
“her” dog (the girl, at age 9, got Hershey as a puppy) and exclaims,
“Look, Hershey’s hurt! She can’t walk on one front leg! She’s limping.
And there’s a deep bite mark on her leg. What happened? Oh, Hershey....”
teenager starts crying as she walks over and bends down to pet the wounded
animal. The small dog looked up at her with its inherently sad-looking dachshund
eyes. Acquainted with the behavior of the little rascal, Rachael quickly sized
up the situation and then said,
who left the door open?!”
father did. He felt guilty, even inadequate. So he didn’t answer his daughter
but instead turned his attention down at the wounded animal and said sternly,
DOG! When will you ever learn? This time you got what you deserved. Bad dog!”
up while holding up its damaged leg– obviously pressure applied on it elicited
pain – the sad-eyes expression of the dachshund registered with the master
that it comprehended that it was getting scolded for misbehavior. He knew the
understand what “bad dog” meant. But he wasn’t sure about the dog knowing
the meaning of “stupid.” He did speculate however, that from the tone of his
voice, the dog got the message that “stupid” was not praise.
of the humans could read the dog’s mind when it thought,
calls me stupid!
As things turned out, the
dachshund survived the wound and was fortunate to be able to walk again.
does this breed learn from its mistakes? Does misfortune turn into wisdom?
next month, same scenario. Inadvertently left opened door. Same fragile elderly
lady and big bad dog on a leash being walked across the street.
would little Hershey do? Yes, you guessed it.
angry barks directly from the front door, then dashing down the steps and
driveway on a beeline to the larger dog with longer legs – and fangs.
time, will the old woman be able to hold on tighter and win out over the weight
of that young dog, still gaining in size, weight, and power– as opposed to his
master’s declining physical strength?
bless her brave little heart, guessed not!
to be presumed that the dachshund, this time, had heard the car coming down the
street. Dogs can estimate distance from the volume of sound. Remember how as you
walked pass a house, a dog laid in wait behind a fence until the very second
that you were close to it, then barked ferociously, thereby startling you? So
just as it can gauge how far a pedestrian is, so can it tell how far a car is
that is approaching its position.
old woman had no chance to hold on to the powerful canine – just like the last
time. The husky barked at the charging, puny, hot dog on four chicken
drumsticks. Then it snarled,
time I’m going to kill you, old lady! Forget those poor excuses for legs. This
time I’m going to rip open your damn tiny throat! Then I’m going to tear off
one of your short skinny legs and chew on it for a snack!
within feet of the huge dog, now again tearing away from the grasp of the weak
woman, the dachshund once again did a 360-degree rotation, and then tore back
towards the other side of the street. The big dog followed in hot pursuit, its
full attention on its intended prey.
dead meat this time, grandma! it ferociously growled.
yeah? Well catch me if you can, big boy!
the little dog barked back.
small dog’s burst of speed across the street was in time. Just as it had timed
it. Not so for the pursuing husky. It got hit straight on by the oncoming car.
There was a piercing yelp upon impact. Then all was quiet.
panting dachshund hopped the porch’s steps and was back in the house. Nobody
from the residence had seen what had just occurred out on the street. A
previous gust had rushed up the driveway and pushed open the door that was
carelessly left slightly open. After the dog had reentered, a wayward breeze
closed the door shut. None of the humans were in attendance this time.
Hershey’s caretaker was in the laundry room, her husband was at work, and
their daughter had left for summer school.
who’s a stupid dog?
the little brown doggy thought as it settled in on its fluffy cushion in a
kitchen corner, tenderly licking her healing leg. Since the small laundry room
was an extension of the kitchen, Hershey’s caretaker spotted the dog’s
return to its resting quarters.
a nice day, Hershey?”
course, dogs can’t answer back. The dachshund merely looked up at the woman
with its innately expressive, sullen eyes. Then she licked the outside of her
mouth with her tongue.
want a snack, girl?”
dachshund chewed on a piece of tasty beef jerky, with its long keen ears, it
could hear the old woman howling outside on the street.
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